Monday, July 30, 2007

Who knew our secret lives were this dreadful?

Just when I was getting the hang of ignoring links to the British dance-techno-house music duo "The Freemasons" in my Google Alerts, along comes a god-awful band from Asheville, North Carolina calling themselves "Secret Lives of the Freemasons."

Despite the rave reviews that they have self-published on their MySpace account, I gotta say, these guys stink. Yeah, I know, that's a value judgment on my part, and who am I to judge? Someone must love them, since it's all over Google today that they've just been signed to Victory Records! Like I know who Victory Records! is. Or even what "hardcore/screamo/emo" is supposed to sound like.

The people who wrote the reviews posted on TheirSpace have terrible taste in music, in my not-so-humble opinion. But I like the reviewers' writing — some very clever imagery there. Too bad they wasted their best turns-of-phrase promoting this band. Every song I listened to sounded like Dr. Frankenstein resurrected Joey Ramone, Bob Mould, and Ozzie Osborne, welded them to a drummer marching to a different drum, and sent them to audition to be Disney-girl Hannah Montana's backup band.

What a waste of a perfectly good band name.

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  1. Actually WS they are pretty good- LOL. Thanks for turning me on to these guys, I like the whole rock emo sound. If anyone else digs this check out "Coheed and Cambria"


  2. You're welcome.

    For all I know, they'll become as popular and famous as the Rolling Stones.

    — W.S.

  3. Hey now, the Joey Ramone and Bob Mould part was sounding pretty good. The disney/emo part, not so much.

  4. The Ramones and Bob Mould (solo and in his various bands) and even Ozzy, separately, are quite enjoyable muscially. But their influences blended with that screaming emo-pop Radio Disney sound — argh!

    — W.S.

  5. Long live Concrete Head, the ultimate Masonic band!


  6. Rock on Brothers!!! Finally something worth commenting on. I'm not so much into the EMO seen. Too winey! That's what I get for being raised on Southern Rock and Metal. Rage on WS.


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