[For your listening pleasure, you can click here to open a new window and listen to a demon-possessed MIDI file of "Tubular Bells," also known as "Theme from The Exorcist."]
A few weeks ago Father Gabriele Amorth, the official exorcist of the Diocese of Rome, Italy, announced that the Holy Father would soon undertake a new campaign to combat demonic possession. "Thank God," said the Italian priest, "we have a Pope who has decided to confront the devil head-on."
A couple of days after that, official Vatican spin doctors denied the story, saying, "Pope Benedict XVI has no intention of ordering local bishops to bring in garrisons of exorcists to fight demonic possession."
Father Amorth, who has personally cast the Devil out of someone over 3,000 times in the past 20 years, made news at least twice lately. In March, 2006 he accused a Mr. Harry Potter of being one of Satan's ringleaders. In August, 2006 he told the world that Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler were "possessed by the Devil." (Oddly, he didn't point the finger at any current world leaders.)
If Prince of Pitchforks is really taking possession of people at such an alarming rate, why did the Papal pals pull the plug and poop on the priest's parade? I mean, why isn't the Vatican backing Father Amorth, who says that the horned and hoofed hero of the heathen is everywhere?
"I speak with the Devil every day. I talk to him in Latin. He answers in Italian. I have been wrestling with him, day in day out, for 14 years," Amorth said in a 2001 interview.
The Pope himself is no stranger to Satan's influence. Benedict XVI, formerly known as Joseph Ratzinger, was Prelate of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith for many years before being poped a few years ago. The previous name of that organization was The Holy Inquisition, a group famous for giving hotfoots to more than a few sinners over the years. The Pope, as a youngster in Germany, was forced to become a member of the Hitler Youth, and later was drafted into military service by the German Army during World War II. I'm sure he's seen the Face of Evil many times.
So why has he backed down from Father Amorth's exorcism extravaganza?
We need exorcists now more than ever!
Just last week, an Idaho man discovered he bore the Mark of the Beast on his body, and to get rid of it, cut off his hand and microwaved it to a crisp.
And a few days later, in Washington, DC, long a home to Satan, cops serving an eviction notice found a mother of four calmly sitting amidst the rotting corpses of her four daughters, aged 5 to 17. The mom said that her daughters were "possessed by demons" and had died in their sleep, one by one, within a week of each other.
And in Mississippi, a man posing as a traveling preacher is scamming local churches out of room and board and sometimes cash in a diabolical plot reminiscent of the Walking Dude from Stephen King's The Stand.
Clearly, Satan is running amuck.
Even if the Pope quashes Father Amorth's plan to send forth Catholic exorcists across the land to save us from ourselves, we can thank God we have Protestant exorcist Bob Larson still on the job.
But wait! There's more to worry about. We apparently have at least two Anti-Christs walking among us, plus one sitting on your lap or desktop.
The first video proves without a doubt that Prince William, son of Prince Charles and the late Princess Diana, is the Anti-Christ, and will be put on the Throne in 2015, aided by diabolical, numerological Freemasons.
The second one tells us that the Pope himself is the Anti-Christ, as have been all of them since at least the 1930s.
The third video tells us that our home computer is in reality The Anti-Christ. Rut-roh, Shaggy!
The Anti-Christ Prince:
The Anti-Christ Pope:
The Anti-Christ Computer:
Anti-Christ | Pope Benedict XVI | Exorcism | Satan | Gabriele Amorth | Burning Taper | BurningTaper.com