Saturday, August 04, 2007

Down at the car wash: Drunk preacher in skirt flashes kids, then offers arresting officers oral sex

Did you feel an unexpected desire to be released from the clutches of Hell and stop being a Freemason on Saturday morning?

He says "the prayer we pray covers all the vows from Masonic influence and breaks sickness, poverty, and all kinds of influences that seem to 'hang on' you." I can only assume Pastor Ernie wants to get us to repeat that ridiculous 12-page prayer making the rounds among evangelical Christians that The Burning Taper first wrote about in April 2006 and again in May 2007.

I was just wondering what kind of effect Pastor Ernie Hays' Masonic prayer time had on you. I wonder if it did any good at all. Their prayer vibes for "major deliverance" didn't quite reach down here to Georgia, and I'm only 150 miles away from them. Maybe the signal couldn't get through the mountains between us.

Pastor Ernie and his wife Pastor Melody run a downtown Asheville, NC church in a building that doubles (or did) as a drug-infested hip-hop nightclub on Saturday nights.

When these street evangelists at Soteria Ministries aren't praying for Masons to be freed from Satan's grasp, they're feeding Asheville's street people donuts and sandwiches on Sunday mornings and promoting online a gasoline additive guaranteed to improve your mileage by 20%.

More Christian nuttiness from Appalachia

Speaking of preachers, did you see the news story last week about Bristol, Virginia's Tommy Tester, age 58, a church pastor and Christian radio personality, who was arrested for taking a leak in front of children at a car wash? The inebriated man of God was wearing a skirt during the incident.

According to police, Rev. Tester also offered to give the arresting officers blow jobs.

A half-empty pint of vodka (or was it optimistically half-full?) along with an empty bottle of Oxycodone were found in his car.

His church is rallying around him in support, though the manager of Christian/gospel station WZAP-AM said Tommy has been "relieved" of his duties.

Tommy has denied all allegations. He probably doesn't remember a thing.

The radio station's flagship broadcast is Charles Stanley's "In Touch."

Stanley made his mark by co-founding the Moral Majority with Jerry Falwell. His sermons and radio shows used to focus on family matters and parenting, until he and his now ex-wife went through a nasty divorce that stayed in the headlines for years. Stanley was also twice president of the Southern Baptist Convention, a Christian group adamantly and vocally opposed to Freemasonry.

| | | | | |


  1. There's so much cosmic karmic weird ju-ju going on in this post, it's like I stumbled late into an Ionesco play. I hardly know whether to be crapulous or wind my watch.

  2. I can see and understand your Point of View; W.S. I agree that many fundamentalist are Anti-Masons, anti-Mormons, ect.

    We as masons are given a charge as an EA not to suffer the ignorance of others, we should not bother oursleves with their opinions or with a grain of salt.

    But many of us as masons are Christians also. I believe there needs be a balance in all things. I find God to be a more loving God than one who "sits on his throne damning everyone". Just as one crazy preacher is against masonry, masonry shouldnt be against them either. We just happen to be more liberal, more freethinking, more open minded.

    In my own personal quest in masonry, I have come across people both ignorant and very open. Some simply don't know and a friendly talk usually sets them straight.

    As Christians, did Christ say "glory be to those who persecuteth those who don't believe in me?" or did he command us to "love one another, as I have loved you."

    Christ taught through example, and if we are to be TRUE Christians, we are to be as he did, and live, love, and teach by example. He tought among the pharasees who did persecute Him, but he still loved them nonetheless.

    Again, balance in all things brother.

  3. The inebriated man of God was wearing a skirt during the incident.

    Ach, crimmens, it were a kilt, yer big drossie! Besides, dan't the wee'uns 'eer seen a mon needin' a loo? Crivey!

  4. Masons are cowards. They attack Christians because they know they won't respond, but ignore the Religion of the Old Testament, which there own cult is based on, because they know they will.

    Freemasonry, a play on nothing in three acts.

  5. Anonymous said: "Masons are cowards. They attack Christians because they know they won't respond, but ignore the Religion of the Old Testament, which there own cult is based on, because they know they will."

    Nothing I wrote here about the skirt-wearing drunk exhibitionist closet homosexual minster, or the street preacher who wants to pray the Devil out of Freemasons, was an "attack." It's just news....

    Believe it or not, Freemasonry's ranks are filled with Christians, so many that in many jurisdictions their religious beliefs often overwhelm Masonic activities.

    By the way, here's a partial list of famous Christians who were Freemasons, taken from a post of Rev. Josh "The Baptist" Buice's website. Josh was never timid about "responding" to criticism.

    Bellamy, Francis J. - The Baptist Minister who created America's Pledge of Allegiance.

    Burrows, Lansing - President of the Southern Baptist Convention (1914-1916), secretary of the SBC from 1881-1913, and pastor of 8 Southern Baptist churches.

    Carroll, B. H. - First president of Southwestern Seminary and instrumental in the creation of the Department of Evangelism of the Home Mission Board of the Southern Baptist Convention.

    Christian, John T. - Baptist Minister; Professor of Church History and Librarian of the Baptist Bible Institute. The Library on the New Orleans seminary campus bears his name.

    Clark, Montague Graham, Jr. - Presbyterian minister and President of the School of the Ozarks.

    Conner, W. T. - Taught theology at Southwestern Seminary 1910-1949.

    Darrah, Delmar - Stimulus, imagination and drive for the founding of the American Passion Play, a vivid portrayal of the life of Jesus of Nazareth, for more than four decades, one of the Midwest US's greatest religious dramas and the forerunner of all such plays in the United States.

    Hamilton, William W. - Named the Southern Baptist Convention's Home Mission Board's first head of the Department of Evangelism in 1906. He served as president of Baptist Bible Institute (BBI), now the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary, from 1927 to 1943. While president, he saved BBI from bankruptcy in 1932 when the school defaulted on $353,000 in bonds. President of the SBC from 1940 to 1942.

    Hobbs, Herschell Harold (d. 1995). - An ordained Southern Baptist minister for 69 years, he wrote at least 147 books and Bible commentaries used in Southern Baptist churches. He preached more than 700 sermons on the syndicated radio program, the "Baptist Hour" between 1958 and 1978. He was president of the Southern Baptist Convention from 1961-63. He was raised a Master Mason in Siloam Lodge No. 276 in Oklahoma City at the age of 54, which was during his first term as president of the Southern Baptist Convention. He became a Scottish Rite Mason in 1966 while a preacher on the "Baptist Hour."

    Lawrence, J. B. - Vice president of the Southern Baptist Convention and Secretary-Treasurer of the Home Mission Board for 30 years.

    Marshall, Peter - Presbyterian pastor of churches in Georgia and Washington, DC, Chaplain of the US Senate and author of such books as 'Mr. Jones, Meet the Master.' His biography is entitled "A Man Called Peter."

    McCall, Abner V. - President, Chancellor and President-Emeritus of Baylor University in Texas, he also served as the First Vice President of the Southern Baptist Convention (1979-80) and a long-time leader of the Organization of Baptist Colleges and Universities. He wrote, "In thousands of meetings of Freemasons and of Baptists stretching back 60 years, I have seen nothing that made my belief and work in the Fraternity of Freemasons incompatible with my belief and work as a member of a Southern Baptist church."

    Murrow, Joseph Samuel - Southern Baptist Home Missionary - and the "Founder of Freemasonry in Oklahoma," he is said to have established more than 100 churches.
    Newton, Louie D. - President of the Southern Baptist Convention; Vice President of the Baptist World Alliance; served 27 years on the SBC Executive Committee.

    Truett, George W. - Pastor of the First Baptist Church, Dallas (1897-1944); President of the Southern Baptist Convention; President of the Baptist World Alliance.

    Wesberry, James P. - Pastor of the Morningside Baptist Church of Atlanta, Georgia for 31 years; Recording Secretary of the Georgia Baptist Convention for 20 years. Died in 1992.

    White, William - President of Baylor University 1948-1961; Executive Secretary and later President of the Baptist General Convention of Texas.

    — W.S.

  6. Masons are cowards. They attack Christians because they know they won't respond, but ignore the Religion of the Old Testament, which there own cult is based on, because they know they will.

    The "Religion of the Old Testament," eh?

    You give credence to the adage "Scratch an anti-Mason, find an anti-Semite."

  7. To attack Christianity is not "anti-semitism"?

    Just admit it Mason, you are a coward. Your cult is just warmed over judiaism, you deity the mass murdering hypocrite God of the Jews - and Christians.

  8. Hey Wimpo's Son, you just made my point.

    What a pack of hypocrits and no minds Masons are.

    The Craft of the Crafty? Hardly.

    Oh Wimpo's Son, you spend all of that time shitting over your brothers and brotherhood, then try to suck up to them. What a pathetic waste of electrons.

  9. WOW! Looks like someone put Widows son in his place. I feel the same as this poster.


  10. Oh no!

    Put in my place by a couple of blog trolls! Where's my hara-kari blade? I must kill myself to atone for my shame!


    — W.S.

  11. Oh that was a good comeback. Watch out Widows son is breaking out the comebacks. Excuse me while I step back.


  12. jean jean the rhetoric machine
    another pantheist chiming in...
    Putting someone in their place is highschool rhetoric at best....

    jean jean the lemming machine

    jean's ward supervisor at Treemont Psych Hospital

  13. Your cult is just warmed over judiaism, you deity the mass murdering hypocrite God of the Jews - and Christians.

    See, unlike you trollish types, I actually sign my name and am willing to cite examples and give these things called "facts" about the fraternity. You only seem to be making unfounded accusations.

    On what do you base your allegation that Freemasonry
    a) is a cult?
    b) is in any way related to Judaism?
    c) worships any god, Christian or otherwise?

    For that matter, tell me where WS attacks Christianity? More often than not, he points out the foibles of Masons who tend to bring too much religious bias into the Craft. He also tends to publicize the foibles of Christians who demonize the fraternity, not Christians in general.

  14. Oy Vay,

    Every now and then a mason chat or blog will get swarmed by trolls.

    Anyways. Good point Tom. You see, thats another thing I enjoy about this fraternity. The people who join are tolerant and open minded. They are able to THINK for themselves. And base points of discussion with factual evidence. "By their fruits ye shall know them."

    On an endnote; Wow, W.S. such a popular guy you are.

  15. Tommy Tom Tom,

    1) They're all cults. Christianity (P or RC variety), Judaism, Freemasonry, Golf. Look up the definition of the word cult in a dictionary or catechism sometime.

    2) You should read up on the structure and practices of the Levites sometime. You don't seriously believe any of the Knights Templar crapola do you?

    3) Re-read your Masonic Catechisms and Prayers while meditating on the Volume...

    Here's the deal; Old Testament God a crazy mercurial psychotic. Becomes man. See's how tough it is and concludes maybe he has been a little overcritical of his creations. Ascends back to heaven a mellower all-knowing Great Architect. 1-2-3.

    Now if you genius's kill off step 2 you're not left with much.

    If God can be reborn, then maybe Brother Tommy Tom and El Wimpo's Son could lower themselves...

    Any Nimius

  16. Right on Any. I love the open minded comment. Lets see they also said Hitler was being open minded and we know what he did with masons. I think I will open my mind as Tommy has said. Hell they said the killing in Rawanda were being done by people with open minds. Nice try Tommy.


    And whoever it was that came up with Jean ryme here you should be up for a rap contract in the near future.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.